I’m a procrastinator. I’ll do anything to avoid doing the one thing I’m supposed to be doing. Last Friday, I shampooed the hallway carpet in my building because it looked dirty. Meanwhile, I had a laundry list of chores waiting inside my own condo. My neighbors probably think I’m considerate. My wife has more information.

I’ve always been like this, and I’ve tried to change, but I think it’s time to accept who I am. Working on yourself is still work, and I’ve already made my position on that pretty clear.

These funny tweets gave us something to laugh about today. Hopefully, you’ll find a few worth sending to whoever you usually bother via text all day. That’s an important relationship to maintain.

1.

Tweet by Eden Dranger about adult birthdays mainly texting back thanks.via twitter

2.

Employee Tears tweet about ending a meeting early and pursuing passions.via twitter

3.

Lynne's tweet about leftover soup needing a round container because soup is round.via twitter

4.

Empty fridge with some food items and condiments, meme about dinner for 30 people.via twitter

5.

Commenting 'disgusting AI slop' under a picture of a friend's healthy newborn child.via twitter

6.

via twitter

7.

A tweet about a woman asking about a phone while the user guesses 'PENIS' and gets gray letters.via twitter

8.

Person holding a tiny pumpkin cookie with a green stem and orange pumpkin face.via twitter

9.

Twitter post by sixfootcandy about returning printed items.via twitter

10.

Realtors call it pre-war, but it's just luxury apartments with modern appliances and interiors.via twitter

11.

Tweet about coffee and women feeling when you tuck a flower behind their ear.via twitter

12.

Weapon's tweet about nutrition info on Cheetos and Crocs.via twitter

13.

Tweet by Dan Baltic about turning 40 and a humorous military moment.via twitter

14.

Two photos of a river scene, one with a person sitting on a rock and the other with a backpack on a岩.via twitter

15.

Definitely Nick's tweet about drunk people walking home with Halloween decorations.via twitter

16.

Tweet from MotionBoy asking Apple to leave his brightness level unchanged.via twitter

17.

A tweet from Resko about company and employee conversation.via twitter

18.

Lady Brett Ashley's tweet about a friend sending a partiful invite for shots at a bar.via twitter

19.

Patrick from SpongeBob with a face mask, holding a full bag of snacks.via twitter

20.

Maturing is realising your sick days are for when you're sick of work.via twitter

21.

Twitter post about forgetting how to say parallel park, with a humorous quote.via twitter

22.

You can just have a lunchable for breakfast they're not going to put you in jail.via twitter

23.

Twitter post by julia about a deer with sad eyes and the urge to run into traffic.via twitter

24.

if you die in wordle you die in real life.via twitter

25.

Rowan Hart's tweet about Irish trauma and grocery stores.via twitter

26.

Bird's tweet about 30 likes and 30 people showing up for dinner last minute.via twitter

27.

Everyone smiles when I tell them I was attacked by a Labradoodle.via twitter

28.

Trump on stage at a rally with a crowd and a banner that says 'America First'.via twitter

29.

Tweet by Harry about brother in Christ taking 10 seconds to recharge at work.via twitter

30.

Trout mask original tweet about buying a bumper sticker before a Volkswagen.via twitter