A staple of every 90s childhood was having a go playing Where In The World Is Carmen Sandiego? on a PC only slightly smaller than a Kia Rio.
I reckon we could reboot the game now, only we could call it, Where In The World Is Meghan?
Where has the Duchess of Sussex gone?
November 27 marks seven years since she – then Meghan Markle, actress, blogger and Angeleno-native – stood next to Prince Harry in Kensington Palace’s iconic Sunken Garden and announced their engagement.
But in the long and winding story of the duchess, which includes an exhausting rinse and repeat of tragi-comedy-drama, 2024 stands out as a remarkable year.
What has happened to arguably one of the most famous women in the world?
In the last six months, Meghan has only done one short interview, a brief two-hander with Harry for US breakfast TV to support the launch of their Archewell Foundation’s Parents Network.
She has not debuted any new TV shows or podcasts (despite signing with Lemonada Media in February).
She has only very occasionally been papped out and about.
She has only done a couple of glam evening appearances and has barely graced any stages.
What has changed?
The first few months of the year pointed to a bumper 2024 for the former Suits star.
February saw the Sussexes in Vancouver to promote next year’s first winter Invictus Games, proving demonstrably her snow style is as superb as her regular style. March brought with it skiing at a chic Utah resort with friends, her taking part in an opening keynote panel at the uber-cool SXSW festival to celebrate International Women’s Day, and finally, only days later, came the debut of her brand-slash-business-slash-ongoing-mystery American Riviera Orchard (ARO).
Then, only a few weeks after that, in April, Netflix announced Meghan was set to make a series “[celebrating] the joys of cooking, gardening, entertaining, and friendship”, whatever that means. (Shearing roses while holding hands with your yoga teacher?)
This year promised to be one that would see the duchess making ambitious big Aquazzura-ed strides in her gender equality work, jam production and TV-making.
Buckle up kiddos, it was going to be Meghan time.
Well, that has not panned out now, has it?
The ARO Instagram account languishes away, unloved and covered in dust, her TV show is yet to get an air date, despite filming finishing back around June, and aside from the couple’s international tours to Nigeria and Colombia and a Remembrance Day video, the duchess has largely absented herself from the public stage.
The world has been put on a Meghan starvation diet and I don’t know why.
Look back at how much she managed to cram into 2023, and you will see the picture even more clearly.
In only 12 months, Meghan took centre stage at the Ms Awards in New York, walked the red carpet and spoke to the press at Variety’s Power of Women event, was seen doing some top-notch hob-knobbing and starry shoulder-rubbing at the LA stop of Beyonce’s Reformation tour (hello Kerry Washington, Netflix’s Ted Saranados, Kris Jenner, Jeff Bezos and Lauren Sanchez), hit Las Vegas with Cameron Diaz and Bumble founder and self-made billionaire Whitney Wolfe Herd and was at Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi’s vow renewal with Gwyneth Paltrow, Jennifer Aniston, Courteney Cox, Katy Perry and Orlando Bloom.
Then there was the steady stream of paparazzi snaps of the duchess living the most aspirational of high-low So-Cal post-royal lives – she and Harry were snapped having dinner at San Vicente Bungalows, having a birthday date night in Montecito, leaving a work lunch at LA vegan hotspot Gracias Madre, hanging out with poet Cleo Wade and her hairdresser Kadi Lee, buying flowers at a local farmers’ market and popping out for a burgery bite at In-N-Out.
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Harry and Meghan were also photographed at the Fourth of July parade near their house and trick or treating with their kids.
None of this has happened this year, aside from the Duke and Duchess of Sussex being photographed leaving Tyler Perry’s 55th birthday party in September (where Harry was seen seemingly photographing the press, for what I can only imagine will be a postmodernist multimedia installation piece or a keeper for his Burn Book).
When the US tabloid Star, which has strangely never won a Pulitzer for its reporting, put the Sussexes on the cover this week (the headline 5 Years Later: Meghan & Harry’s shattered world), it was with a photograph taken at the very beginning of the year. It’s not like they have any particularly fresh ones to work with.
What is intriguing to note is that the duchess does appear to have gone to ground – for reasons that are not yet known.
Maybe the couple has just gotten better at swerving long lenses and maybe, aside from October’s Los Angeles Children’s Hospital Gala, her interest in doing some evening dazzling has waned and she’d prefer to be at home in some old trackie pants with a large glass of vino.
(Same here, same here).
Maybe she is done with the bright lights, lime and otherwise, and is focusing on her future business and manifesting a Kmart product deal.
But what will be interesting to watch play out in the coming months is if this marks the beginning of a real shift in the Duchess of Sussex’s visibility – or whether this lull has more to do with her marshalling her forces and preparing for a barnstorming next year.
Tentatively pencil it in – 2025 could be the jam. Or not.
Daniela Elser is a writer, editor and a royal commentator with more than 15 years’ experience working with a number of Australia’s leading media titles