Parents expect their daughter to cover nearly all household expenses after she lands her first job, call her selfish when she wants to save for her future: ‘I have my own future to plan for’

A 29-year-old woman is reviewing her finances while struggling to save money for her future.

Of course, this is causing the daughter to feel guilty. And I get it. She's 29; she's lived with her parents most of her life, and it's okay if they want some money in return. The problem is that if she starts paying for everything in the house now, including taxes, groceries, and daily necessities, she'll be left with nothing and stuck in a cycle where she can't become independent and move out. Parents should be more understanding of their kids' position, because even though she has the money to help, she needs to focus on her future and build a life on her own. By paying everything in the house now, the daughter won't be able to move out and will end up having their parents as her roommates.

AITA for saying I need to save for my future when my parents keep asking me to cover household expenses?

I (29/F) recently started my first job. Since then, my parents have expected me to pay for almost all the household expenses, including medicines, fruits, groceries, and other daily necessities.

i want to help my parents, and i understand that running a household costs money. but lately, it feels like I'm expected to take care of everything financially just because I've started earning.

i want to save some money of my salary for my future, but whenever i bring it up,my parents say I'm being selfish because i have a job now.

Bills and a calculator that a 29-year-old daughter is expected to pay after starting her first job.

i feel guilty because i don't want my parents to struggle, and I'm happy to help when i can. but i also have my own future to plan for,and I'm worried that if i keep paying for everything, I'll never be able to save enough for myself.

What happens when she stands her ground and tells her parents she would like to save the money? They call her selfish and uncooperative, especially now that she has a job and can earn her own money. But she wants to help around the house; that's not the problem. She doesn't want to spend all the money.

Anyway, she needs to decide what she'll pay and what expenses her parents will cover. And with that, she might be able to start saving up to move out eventually. There comes a point in life when moving out of your parents' home is less a desire than a necessity, and feeling free in your own space is the best feeling. She's not selfish for wanting that money for herself and to think about the future… her parents should be much more understanding.

i don't want to stop supporting my family.i just want to be able to contribute without being responsible for every single expense.

UllsStratocaster You probably need to find a roommate and move out. That's the only way this situation will change.

OldConfusion825 YTA- it's not a bad idea to just give them whatever they need since they have basically paid for you until 29. It's out of the norm for that to happen, and may have put them in a bad financial situation taking care of you that long. It's 5- 10 years longer than the average person will support a kid.

RadientCrone You are 29 years old. You need to be paying for your own medicines and contributing towards the household bills. How long do you expect enabling and a free ride?

RawMeatballz If you're paying rent and utilities and food and all, go live on your own

Elk Best1803 You should be paying 25% of your take home pay to them for rent..

A mother and her adult daughter hugging.

ApartmentHot5376 NTA sit your parents down and tell you are willing to contribute x dollars a month. Or the alternative will be you moving out and paying nothing! You will never be able to save anything if you stay there. They see your money as theirs!

Key Acanthaceae_2817 ESH you do need to be paying your own way but you shouldn't be covering everything. I appreciate you wanting to save but realistically no one is saving these days. Just make sure you pay into a pension

Ciskakid YTA (although your folks needed to prepare you for this inevitable day and talk to you about expectations). They've covered their kid 100% for about a decade longer than most parents need to do. Now it's up to you to talk to your parents about what they spend and do. Take your fair share of those burdens and do a bit more in consideration of their extra support.

Whittster How did they pay household expenses before you were working?

woodwork16 29 and just got your first job? You poor little thing.

Madscientist9191 What is your career being that you're starting when you're almost 30?

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