'She is not willing to abide by the original terms agreed on': Cat drama pushes concerned pawrent to tell landlord to enforce the two pet pawlicy, protecting her cat but risking friendship with her bestie roomie

5 hours ago 1
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    'The loophole here is that my lease only allows 2 animals'

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    I (21F) have lived in a townhome for a year with my pitbull and cat and am about to get 2 new roommates to replace the 2 old ones. One of my old roommates got a small female cat (my cat is also a small female) in the middle of our lease and they were supposed to be kept seperate as my cat is not friendly to others.

  • 03

    The roommate got careless (as she often did, she was horribly messy and irresponsible) and the cats ended up together and would fight but mostly leave each other alone. This was very stressful and I had to restrict my cat to my room due to my roommates carelessness. I only had a couple months left so i dealt and all was well.

  • 04

    The girl taking over her lease is my best friend. She signed the lease and then rescued a massive male stray. She asked if I was okay with her keeping him and I said he would have to never come in contact with my cat and probably remain upstairs. A few days go by and she took him to the vet and found out he had FIV.

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    Cheezburger Image 10534518272

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    Here is where I screwed up. She called and asked if I was okay with this, and I told her no but I would try and see if this works. She had told me how attatched she already was. She knows me well and knows I am always going to do anything for anyone at any cost to myself. She knows I would never flat out tell her no, despite me expressing how

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    uncomfortable I was. She also knows that my cat is everything to me and is my ESA that took me out of a very dark place 2 years ago.

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    She moved in, and is already making my cat stay downstairs and letting hers be in the common area. I thought it best for him to not be introduced to that area so he wouldn't "miss" it and my cat who has lived here a year can keep living as she has with my dog who is her best friend. She is being very

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    Cheezburger Image 10534517248

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    inconsiderate and careless. She doesn't do a good job making sure he doesn't come downstairs. I have arranged for her to be with my grandparents for the year, as I would never forgive myself if this affected her negatively and I would hate my roommate for letting it happen. This leaves my dog without a companion (her cat terrorizes her and she is afraid of him) and me heartbroken, but my cat safe.

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    brought all of this up to her and she said that s ks and she understands. The only agreement being that she could have someone else keep him 3 days a week which is still 4 days unsafe. The loophole here is that my lease only allows 2 animals. These 2 slots are taken by my two ESAs being my dog and cat.

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    Would I be a terrible person to threaten this even though I only said I would try and make this work? She feels I should have put my foot down earlier and I agree, but I am never one to not try. I did, and it didn't work. What do I do?

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     I agreed to allow her to keep the cat on the terms that he would remain upstairs and completely separated from mine. She has since introduced him to the main floor and he now freaks out if stuck upstairs (which is why I said we should stick to him being upstairs) and she doesn't

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    keep a close eye on him and lets him near my door (where both can reach hands underneath). He is aggressive towards her and my dog and my cat is aggressive back (she left him downstairs one time and they already almost encountered one another). WE HAVE HAD A CONVO ABT IT but she is not willing to abide by the original terms agreed on. That is where we are at.

  • 15

    TrickSea_239 YWBTA. "Yes I'm happy to try with this cat, we'll ignore the lease" to "this isn't working for me, the lease only allows 2 pets anyway which are mine so I'm going to use that against you now".

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    How harsh. She's right, you should have been upfront from the start. Using the lease to get out of something you agreed with is behaviour.

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    You're 21. "The lease only allows 2 pets, I already have 2 pets, and I know from previous that my cat can't share space with another cat so it won't be fair on either of them". You're going to have to stop being a doormat at some point in your life, that would have been the time to start. Using the lease now is just as cowardly. Talk it out.

  • Saying no upfront would’ve saved a lot of hissterics. Now the situation’s all tangled like a ball of yarn and harder to paw through.

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     you for letting it slide at the beginning when you knew it was likely to be a problem, and her for violating the boundaries you set together. I don't know how big your townhouse is, but I feel like you're both kind of for letting this situation happen when you knew how restricted the cats' lives would be.

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    Voidfishie You said you would try and see how this works and it hasn't worked. That's the answer. You need to grow a spine and say that.

  • Better to have a paws-itively honest chat with your roommate first. Clear the air and set boundaries. Going to the landlord can claw at friendships, so try talking before raising the alarm.

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    TheRealBeelzebabs YWBTA. You can't bait and switch like this. You made a decision and although you regret it, going scorched earth like that will not only ruin your friendship with this person and make living with them unbearable but also you'll be living with that

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    regret. Sit down and talk with them like an adult, lay out why you have an issue and how you feel about it and re-state your boundaries. It sounds to me like you two are incompatible as roommates so if she wont agree to actually respect your boundaries relating to where her cat is or rehome him then you need to ask her to find somewhere else to live.

  • Sometimes friends make purrfect pals but not purrfect roommates. Switching living arrangements might be the best way to keep both cats happy and save your friendship from scratching and hissing. 

  • 22

    Small-Pear2283 YWBTA - involving the landlord would definitely be too far. That being said, your roommate is in the wrong for violating the rules you initially agreed upon, but I can't write her off as a total AH since she did check with you and get your permission at the beginning of all this.

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    The boundaries were either miscommunicated or misinterpreted somewhere along the way. I understand how desperate this situation you must feel at this point to be considering invoking the lease, but there's simply no easy way out of this. Knowing and acknowledging your own

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    weaknesses/limitations in terms of standing up for yourself is one thing, but taking responsibility for them and the consequences is another. Now's your chance to fix it by sitting down with your friend, shouldering a tough conversation, and working out a solution together. Good luck and wishing the best to you both and your pets!

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