Remembering Hollywood legend Diane Keaton in her own words

‘Gotta Give’ Diane her due

Diane Keaton. I once reported she had five cats.

A one of a kind. In ’84, Diane enrolled in a dramatic workshop. In ’85, she bought $100 worth of Life magazines to research a certain dress period — same year she figured into an ABC-TV agreement while consuming a medium hamburger at then hotshot spot Maxwell’s Plum.

In the ’80s, she and Warren Beatty played His & Hers. In ’97, she wore white wristie gloves all night. In ’96 she said: “Most people look like they haven’t even experienced life.” In ’22, said: “ ‘The Godfather’ established my career.” She once starred in “Hair.” In senior citizen movie “Poms,” she said, “Being old is not new.” In ’96’s “The First Wives Club,” she then said: “People who don’t age look like they haven’t experienced life.”

In ’89, St. Martin’s Jonathan Moor did her bio. In ’71 she met Al Pacino. In ’92 they did Primola’s and Second Avenue kosher deli. ’93 she monitored the International Center for Photography. ’93 she was a canine’s talking voice, ’95 she directed “Unstrung Heroes.” September 2000 she sold her house to Madonna then threw back an extra million to move out in 10 days.

’04 for “Something’s Gotta Give”: She said: “I’m more comfortable in kissing scenes with Jack Nicholson than Keanu Reeves because Jack is physically imperfect.” She then bought a $7 million Laguna Beach house, “which I intend to restore.” How great Woody Allen is, who knows but her ’05 quote was: “Woody learned a lot about women by dating me.” How great her feet were, also nobody knows — but — although this doesn’t come up in conversation too often — in ’06 a foot specialist said: “Her toes are too long.”

’04: “About aging, deterioration is offset by a greater degree of gratitude. I’ve experienced asthma. The American Lung Association, talking of my smoking, said, ‘Something’s got to give.’ ” 

Some rainy day thoughts

So, the weather. I’ve lived through many big storms, hurricanes. October ’89 I was guest of then Numero Uno mystery writer hotshot Mickey Spillane. It was Hurricane Hugo. His shoreside home inches off the waves of South Carolina’s Myrtle Beach. And what was left of his gorgeous white front mansion?

Hugo had stuck a toilet onto the once manicured front green lawn. A live pelican sat at his wrecked dining room table. The watermark in his living room was halfway up the wall. The entire home destroyed. His prized chess set gone.

He didn’t cry. Didn’t scream. I got the hell out of there. He rebuilt.

Please explain

Questions: Why is Hungarian-born zillionaire George Soros funding so many anti-American disobedience happenings?

Why are hospital rooms proving so dirty that they’re even killing patients?

Why are so many college professors leftists?

Why stories praising Nepal when years ago the pilot of my plane ambled through the passengers’ cabin barefoot?

Why’d Sliwa not push the American Orthopedic Society to learn why wheelchairs cost an arm and a leg?

Why has Comey not got Hunter’s old lawyer?

Bulletin: In Oregon a trans student who showered naked in the high school girls’ locker room just gained the title of Miss Congeniality.

Only in Oregon, kids, only in Oregon.