NYC has the best of everything — so why aren’t so-called ‘experts’ giving it respect?

Hey, New York’s always No. 1

Some good news — temporarily. For visitors — not immigrants — let’s talk our badly treated NYC. Forget an occasional rat or homeless roach, we’re talking housing, noise, scaffolds, expenses, shootings, transportation, migrants, taxes, our mayor maybes, stores closing, traffic impassable, Broadway narrowing, DDs (dreadful Democrats), high rents, low lifes, lousy politics, parking impossible, prices impossible, thefts — sadly none include the mayor’s coat closet.

Yet tourism experts list NYC as having four — four? — of the top 10 attractions of this great nation. Four?!

Four? Must be these so-called experts can’t count beyond five.

There’s something called Tripadvisor. I never heard of them — but, then, I never before also never heard of commie candidate Slam-damn-me either.

This survey demotes Central Park to No. 4. Empire State Building takes No. 2. Please. And it ignores: Fifth Avenue, Park Avenue, Bryant Park library, St. Pat’s, Rock Center, 47th Street’s Diamond District, Chinatown, Yankee Stadium, Freedom Tower, Bronx Zoo, Statue of Liberty, Seventh Avenue’s Fashion District, Guggenheim, Brooklyn Museum, Greenwich Village, East Side/West Side/and all around the town, stores like Bergdorf’s, Vuitton, Saks.

More: Times Square, ice skating rinks, the ferries, East River, Hudson River, Ellis Island, the High Line, Grand Central Terminal, American Museum of Natural History with its dinosaurs, 9/11 Memorial, Staten Island, outdoor food markets, Dumbo, Hell’s Kitchen, Soho, Lower East Side, the Rolls-Royce showroom, the former steamship docks.

Plus: We have best bagels, best cheesecake, best steak, best auction houses. Irish food, Italian food, Greek food, Russian food, Chinese food, Japanese food, kosher food, takeout food, Swedish food, French food, Hungarian food, German food, Spanish food, gluten-free food, British (ugh!) food.

From here you can schlep to Niagara Falls, Catskills, Adirondacks, Finger Lakes, Bear Mountain, Jones Beach, Coney Island. Listen, with luck you can also maybe get back to your stolen car.

There’s the Hayden Planetarium, the Hamptons, Rockaway, nearby Atlantic City, Canada, an aquarium someplace, our gold’s deposit someplace, Wall Street, Harlem, JFK Airport, LaGuardia Airport, nearby Newark Airport, fender repair places, plus stamp collectors, coin collectors, antique collectors, sports clubs, dog places, cat places, art places, bird places, too big with camels we aren’t but we got horse places, turtle places, motorcycle places and dented crash helmet places.

Also driving schools, gardening schools, dance schools, maybe institutions where they teach honesty is not so big in this city — but we got art schools, drama schools, medical schools, cooking schools, business schools, chess schools, knitting schools, acting schools. We got dating places, eyebrow plucking places, fake eyelash affixing places, nose lifting places, yoga specialists, embroidery specialists. Auction houses? We got them.

So, listen, you want to go visit Kansas City? Go. Florida? Please. You want to vacation in Yuma? Go. Forget hello to Herald Square. Give my best to a cactus.

Shove these travel experts, it’s only in New York, kids, only in New York.