Best of the Babylon Bee: Police instantly disperse teen takeover by firing job applications into crowd

Every week, The Post will bring you our picks of the best one-liners and stories from satirical site the Babylon Bee to take the edge off Hump Day. Want more of a chuckle? Be sure to click the links.

Aerial footage showed dozens of teenagers fleeing the scene in horror, some covering their eyes to avoid catching a glimpse of an actual job application. READ MORE

“Soccer is a total snooze-fest. There’s hardly any scoring and half the time the people are barely moving. It’s Euro-slop,” longtime baseball fan Paul Baker said. READ MORE

“The intolerant bigot is dead! Woo-hoo!” cried local Democrat Julia Harmon. “With another enemy deceased, we are one step closer to a country where every human being is valued and respected.” READ MORE

“Forgetting to ask about the rape thing is really coming back to bite us,” said Ken Martin, head of the Democratic National Committee. READ MORE